Living by faith and not by sight

These past few days have been very difficult and stretching. 

Saturday

On Saturday morning two of the boys who have live here with Lisa the longest ran away. It is heartbreaking that they did this after she has poured so much time and energy into them. And they not only ran but they also took some of her things with them. 

How could they do this I thought? Why would you want to run from opportunity, safety, love, and a good life. But the streets is what they know. I feel like God sometimes asks me the same question. "My child, why do you run from the good I have for you. Why do you not trust me with all your heart and remember that I have amazing plans for your life?" And this is often my response to him, "Well Abba, its unknown. How can I know for certain when I cannot see? When I am uncomfortable with something I don't want to continue, I want to go back to the security of the known even if its not the best for me." 

Sunday

Today was the twins birthday! We went to the circus. When we got there we realized it was more than we thought it would be but decide to go anyway. When we get to the counter the lady gave us a deal! Its neat to see the provisions of God when you are at the end of yourself and are forced to trust Him. 

The circus was a blast. We saw lions, tigers, a kangaroo, a camel and a bunch of neat acts. After it was over and by the time we got home I was very tired. In addition to the circus today, I had broken up a dog fight, found out a child had died at the children center, was still trying to process what the boys had done and another boy had come to visit who was possibly going to be stay with Lisa.  It was a full day emotionally and physically to say the least. I was ready to hit the sack when I got to my "casita" and realized the lock was off. 

I called for Lisa and she came with one of the older boys and when we got inside we found out that indeed I had been robbed. My computer, money, chocolates, milk and bread were all gone. I just started crying. It was the thing that pushed me over the ledge. I had never been robbed before. I felt violated. After looking around we came to the conclusion that it was probably the boys. We can't be 100% sure but we have reasons to believe it was them. Part of me hoped it was and part of me hoped it wasn't. My mind was to jumbled to think clearly.

Tuesday

Today I took the boys to a nearby hot springs along the river. As we were walking these worship lyrics came into my head, "We live by faith and not by sight for You, we're living all for you." I don't know what God is going to do with my time here in Honduras, but I do know that I am here for a reason and the timing is not by chance. Where I'm living is not a dangerous place. Lisa has had at least 6 other Americans stay with her and nothing like this has ever happened before. At times I walk in fear. Fear that is not from God but of from my own thinking. Satan would like to creep in wherever he can because he doesn't want God's will to be done. This doesn't mean I should be smart about things, but I will hold onto the promise that He has placed me here for such a time as this and trust He is in control even when I cannot see.